/cuckquean/ - Women sharing their men.

>>2850 (OP) 
Personally, I think this could get messy quickly. In a vacuum, it would be super hot to see my man’s child growing inside another woman, but that wouldn’t be the greatest environment to bring up a child in.

When we have kids, I think I won’t want any actual cucking to happen, because if they found out it would be too hard to explain. But who knows, i might change my mind.

>>2850 (OP) 
>Do you plan to have kids? Would you be okay with the vixen getting pregnant?
I do plan to have kids, but both my man and I agree that no vixen is to have his seed since it'd be wrong to bring a child into the world for fetish's sake. Maybe inside a polygynous marriage would be okay.

>How do you plan to tell the kids about daddy spending time with a woman who isn't mommy?
I don't; the kids aren't going to find out. We'd probably pull back from cuckqueaning once kids are in the picture since like >>2851 we'd find it hard to explain. Not to mention the problems that'd occur once the kid inevitably chattered about it around others.

BTW, there's also a pregnancy thread over at >>449 that crosses over with this a little.

>>2853
>it'd be wrong to bring a child into the world for fetish's sake
Second this.

>>2850 (OP) 
>Do you plan to have kids? 
Maybe
>Would you be okay with the vixen getting pregnant? 
It depends, if things went full polygynist marriage sure. No point in being irresponsible.
>How do you plan to tell the kids about daddy spending time with a woman who isn't mommy?
Likely wouldn't be an issue till they were older and realized that things were off between Dad, Mom, and Auntie; even then it likely wouldn't be a big deal as were rather religious and we'd only have to explain that we were unconventional and not to make a big deal of it

Relevant news article about a polyamorous woman who gave her husband a threesome for his birthday, leading to the other woman getting pregnant:

https://www.dailystar.co.uk/real-life/hubby-baby-woman-threesome-anniversary-26631200

>>3348
Sorry, I made a typo. It was their anniversary, not his birthday.

You probably just have to think ahead with your explanations. If the kids know that the situation is not the standard then they don't need to know the specifics really. Family structures have already been all sorts of weird for thousands of years anyway.

>>3427
What would you tell them at various ages, Anon?

>>3428
When they're very young they just need to know who their mom is and who dad is married to and that it's not the average. Or you could play it as a two moms and one dad sort of explanation while making sure to tell them it isn't the normal thing, which would personally be my preferred way as you may as well just be a large abnormal happy family. When they're early teens they can have a bit more information of it being a unique lifestyle thing and some explanation of who is their biological mom even if both women are still their moms. And when they are young adults they can know anything they think to ask.  Having more parents is probably better for them than just having one, so they'd be better off than a lot of other kids.
Sorry for taking a few weeks to respond, didn't expect to get a reply to my post at all honestly.

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>>3526
>Having more parents is probably better for them than just having one
I'm pretty firmly in the "it takes a village" camp, so I definitely agree with this sentiment. I just wonder if having more parents also means more opportunity for parental conflict? All parties would have to be highly emotionally stable and committed in order to make it work, I think. As a child of divorced parents, I would be sad to see kids exposed to more violence than they need to be, especially if that violence is occurring between the people who are supposed to be caring for them.

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>>3528
>that video

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>>3533
Every time I see it I'm a kid again, hiding in my room waiting for the yelling to stop. I'm sure that wouldn't be the norm in every cuckquean family, heck maybe having additional emotional support would make such family units more stable? If it's a sister wife situation where everyone is fully committed then that may be more likely to succeed, one of the above anons mentioned that. It all seems like it could get messy fast if someone gets jealous of someone else, and god forbid if the woman who didn't bear a child starts to redirect those feelings towards the child. I know the worst case isn't always going to happen, but for me I'd be too worried that it's going to happen. I'd make myself miserable and potentially cause a self fulfilling prophesy.

Also, sorry for dragging the tone down. Enjoy this consolation Kirby.

>It all seems like it could get messy fast if someone gets jealous of someone else, and god forbid if the woman who didn't bear a child starts to redirect those feelings towards the child.
You mean like the constant infanticide in every society with royal harems?

>>3535
Tbh that's what scares me off contemplating IRL polygyny, apart from my need to have my man's emotional exclusivity. Doing polygyny in a monogamous and divorce-ridden society means there's very little collective experience and culture to draw on, no happy norms that everyone understands at a gut level, no common red flags that have become known because they've proved themselves across tons of other households. The cynic in me says that absent those stabilizing factors, more people is just more opportunity for something to go wrong.

I gather that does exist in some American communities where polygyny is practiced (Mormons, some fringe Christians), but those tend to be close-knit, monocultural outliers.

>>3536
To be fair, there's more at stake when royal blood is mixed in, but having to keep that suspicion in the back of your mind that your kids aren't being given the same opportunities as another wife's would be awful. It's hard enough when one full-blood sibling is favored over another.

If we had more general knowledge as to what it's like growing up in such a household, good and bad, we'd have more to go on.

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>>3535
I'm sorry that you had to go through all that Anon.

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>>3536
>You mean like the constant infanticide in every society with royal harems?
You know, I actually almost mentioned royal infanticide but then I considered the same thing >>3537 did and figured it would be best to leave it off. There's something to be considered that being queen mother meant you were of status yourself, so killing off the competitors of your children wasn't just to your benefit but was also to the benefit of yourself. Given a more modern context I would think you wouldn't go around killing another woman's child, but that doesn't mean you wouldn't favor your own (if you have any) or treat their child less well.

>The cynic in me says that absent those stabilizing factors, more people is just more opportunity for something to go wrong.
This is my worry as well, but I'm an eternal pessimist so i have to take that with a grain of salt. Even with that said, relationships are WORK. It's not just lovey dovey good times all the time, you have to actively wake up and decide to love your partner every day, you have to put in that effort. There's also the fact the biological mother's have so many more rights, in the states at least. If you let another woman carry your husband's child and she has a falling out with you, she can just leave and take the kid with her, since it's her kid, and then he would have to pay child support. At least I think that's how it works, I'm definitely not a lawyer so someone correct me if I'm wrong. You can get around this using formal surrogacy or adoption procedures, but that's expensive and a ton of paperwork. In the end no matter how hot it seems to have the other woman bear his child, I can only really see it working in a multiple wives scenario. Maybe I get to be "first wife" but she is still his wife too, with everything that entails. And that means I'd have to move to Utah. Utah may be pretty but I don't know if i could live there.

>>3538
Thank you, anon. I'm ok most of the time, but I can't say it's fun to revisit or that it doesn't still color my current relationships. But I'm alive, I'm safe, I have food in my belly, I have a roof over my head, I'm happy a lot of the time, and I'm so grateful for everything I have. If anything good has come of my upbringing, it has helped me become more compassionate. I've cosigned leases for teens that needed to get out of abusive households, I've donated to women's shelters, I bought groceries for a very stressed looking young mother who was struggling to keep her rambunctious daughter under control. I'm no saint, but I try my best to help where I can so I can make things a little easier for other people. Also, I have ice cream. I buy it by the gallon and eat it over the course of the week. I have to spend more time on a bike as a result, but it's worth it.

>>3535
>>3528
>>3526 here, I've got a tendency towards optimism and also think of things in a "nothing ventured nothing gained" sort of way, so while I recognize how it could go poorly I can't help but believe it's worth trying because if it goes right then it is well worth it.

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This is bullshit but I believe it.

>>3536
That's overstated, what was more common was siblings murdering each other when dad died to head off civil wars over succession

As for divorce, could be sorted out by not getting legally married and instead having contracts written out in advance pertaining to what happens in the event you split up, would obviously need to be in a jurisdiction that doesn't recognize common law marriage and the man would obviously need to be wealthy to support 2 or more partners.

>>3528
It could also come out as competitiveness over kids, I've heard lesbians that get sperm donors often have their relationships go down hill as they argue over which child is cuter/better, not a lesbian so can't confirm but could see a similar dynamic happening with a harem

>>3539
>wasn't just to your benefit but was also to the benefit of yourself

kek

>>3563
This, make sure to vet the other girl(s) thoroughly before contemplating adding them into the dynamic and don't rush it, you can take your time decide, not that many people get married a few months after meeting

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I was thinking about this the other week. It's only tangentially related, but I've heard that children being brought up inside poly households (the kind where there are multiple guys and multiple girls all sexually involved with some combination of each other) are starting to show up as having certain risk factors.

Apparently the unspoken relationship dynamics of a sexually fluid household tend to get a bit strained, and children - who instinctively pick up on such things as part of their drive to seek and maintain nurture - end up affected by it. It's way beyond a developing child's ability to comprehend adult emotional and sexual dynamics, and so not only can the child end up with confused parental imprinting, they also end up competing with unrelated adults for their caregiver's attention and affection without realizing it. Also, the partner count and soft periphery that such households often have brings with them the same risks associated with children whose parent repartners (e.g. single mother with series of boyfriends).

I've not studied the topic myself, but I thought this was interesting to consider against the kind of polygynous households discussed ITT, which if nothing else at least have one father to unify beneath, a more limited set of emotional/sexual dynamics, and something of a social framework setting their expectations.

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>>4742
Oh, which reminds me:
>children - who instinctively pick up on such things as part of their drive to seek and maintain nurture
>children whose parent repartners
I remember long ago reading on... Tumblr, I think, or maybe another blog platform, the diary of a divorced woman who had recently re-partnered, bringing her daughter with her. This woman was sexually submissive, and had a master/slave dynamic with her new... I can't remember if it was boyfriend, husband, fiance, or what. 

We've all seen and heard the different angles on stories both real and fictional that hinge on how children refer to their new stepparent. The two adults were supposedly careful to keep the sexual and D/s stuff out of view, but one evening they're all together and the daughter calls her new stepfather not "<name>", not "Dad" (as they were probably hoping)... but "master". Then she looks over to her mother for approval.

Of course they were appropriately shocked and embarrassed, and gave the daughter a talk about how that's a special way that mommy calls <new man> when they're alone together... but reading it still dropped my stomach. Like, geez, can you imagine? Poor kid's just modelling what she overhears, instinctively seeking security, probably picked up on how that was a special word that made <new man> like mommy more.

I guess that in spite of what you think might be your best efforts, you can't really control what kids pick up on.

>>2850 (OP) 
I can't imagine it being different from having moms and stepmoms.
I've met muslims who grew up with polygamous fathers.
And it all depends on how the relation goes.
If mother and sister wife dont fight with father and no abuse vice versa, kids dont mind.

>>3537
>If we had more general knowledge as to what it's like growing up in such a household, good and bad, we'd have more to go on.
I have muslim friends AMA